Fit n fitter - I Shouldn't Really Be Here

I’m really quite physically fit, fitter than I’ve ever been amazingly but over 50 I do accept that my tummy is now doing it’s own thing to quite a large degree now…. Unconnected to exercise or calorific intake…. just off in its own apparently…. lol 

No it’s lovely 🥰 I’ve worked really hard to achieve even this & it’s lovely…… Gratuitous bikini pix to you. 

If you’ve suffered severe mental health problems & you make it past 40 you’ve done so amazingly well - the stats are clear…. My imaginary autobiography would be called “I shouldn’t really be here”. If you add up the life years lost to each of my conditions it adds up, using the max stat for each condition to exaggerate for effect…… to almost all of my mad massive 55 years that I’ve achieved

ADHD loses you between 11-13 yrs of life when still active in adulthood, with women disproportionately more likely to die from accident….(that’s very ADD)

BPD = a risk of 15-20 yrs lost and Bipolar 1 can lose you 11-20 from the average life expectancy.

I know that’s a overdramatic way of viewing it but I’ve used it for affect…. The overall average for severe mental illness is about 10 yrs lost….but it’s the quality of life lost thats the real disaster for all mental illness imo…..the suffering, the loneliness, the low self esteem…. that’s what’s really tough…..be kind to yourself for gods sake & practice having your own back for when no one else does. 💜🙌

The difference between having long term severe mental illness & having a breakdown (*edited)

So I watched this & it got me sparking so I thought I’d share: Trauma, Shame & Being Enough

So Patti & I agree that within all so called Mental Illness is brain & nervous system dysfunction caused by some kind of trauma, a maladaptive response to stress &/or insurmountable stress.

Then I’d like to add Dr Amens thoughts about general anaesthetic, sedation & even local anaesthetic & then also head injury from accident or sports contributing to long term mental illness structurally via direct hardware brain/nervous system injury.

 *Then theres the obvious systemic inflammation from poor diet, food sensitivities & ready irritants like alcohol & drugs both legal & illegal (with exclusions in both those latter categories for some people eg CBD seems especially helpful across the board) confounding the nervous system particularly during childhood & adolescence reeking havoc on susceptible developing physiologies*

But I have the question….. what is the difference between a robust nervous system that can withstand endless insults of a range of types without developing a serious longterm fault or which recovers its prior function relatively swiftly & easily & one that simply does not or cannot.

We used to call it a constitutionally highly strung type because of course, the more sensitive someone is the more likely to spiral into increasing mental illness, that is; nervous system dysfunction, when faced with overwhelming stress or psychological insult. But the nurture aspect is crucial too. Support, genuine unconditional, family, community, friendship support can make or break a nervous system, I have no doubt, just as negative experiences in family or community can condemn us to a worse life. 

Like attracts like, of this i'm sure. My social circles in the past largely ended up with diagnoses or early death from Substance Use Disorders, old world alcoholism & drug addiction, that the vile Right Wing press would still have you believe is a weakness of character & not trying hard enough rather than what it is; the surface expression & attempted suppression of the symptoms of serious Nervous System Dysfunction. The eventual diagnoses or self diagnoses have all been, across the board, the most helpful thing for all of these people.

Patti's Talk I think is a worthy discussion for those who have had a single intense period of breakdown after really being predominantly functional, but it needs to be known that these bouncing back robust types have perhaps not suffered insurmountable psychological or physical adversity without adequate support. 

For those of us with long term ongoing nervous system dysfunction, there is for sure something of use for us in this talk, but id like to see the difference in these 2 groups discussed more frequently & deeply to help us find more answers for all.

Article Summing up Benefits of Red Light NIR Therapy

 https://platinumtherapylights.com/blogs/news/brain-light-therapy

Here is a really thorough review of the benefits of Red Light Therapy particularly regarding brain health but bear in mind that these guys make devices so it leans a bit towards sales speak & somewhat glorified interpretations of research but skimming through I cannot argue with it much except that, as with most natural therapies, getting proper extensive research done is nigh impossible if it’s going to detract from Big Pharma profit & if you read the possible list of benefits, like natural Progesterone- some unpatentable things just help too many lucrative conditions.

Also, as I said, Sunlight is the real healer. Warmth & Light from the Sun, if your climate & emotional psychological disposition permits, otherwise this therapy might help you get out there. 

My Current Isochronic Tones Playlist

So all the credit here goes to Jason Lewis, the man behind the music of ‘Mend Amend’ - find a massive catalog free to use on YouTube with beautiful graphics or stream on all the usual streaming services. Obviously there are others but currently, for me, MindAmend has it all. Here is his entirely extraordinary YouTube Channel https://youtube.com/c/MindAmend & here is his Website for purchases https://www.mindamend.com/

My god these things have become the love of my life, yes there are times when they don’t help but actually they are few & far between- the relief is still mostly whilst I’m using them but I feel that this will be gradually accumulative & as is the main rational behind some medication I am convinced that time spent being well & functional encourages further stabilisation of & establishment of those brain states of being well & functional. Just as time spent being unsupported in mental disorganisation &/or emotionally dsyregulated reinforces that. Anxiety, generally speaking still down to a decent 1/2 out of 10 from a previous daily without trigger 7/8 out if 10 - if this is the only change I’d still think it’s a wonder but I know there is much much more to gain.

I’m using the Schumann Resonance ones a lot - this is the speed of the Earths own frequency on the borderline of calm Theta to ‘work a day’ Alpha at 7.83hz - SR is my go to calm but alert tone & it totally enhances time spent in nature, deepening the sense of connection & experiential involvement as part of nature. My home base tone.

When I wake up too early & get unwanted premature surges of cortisol I go to Theta around 5.5hz & if I don’t get back to sleep at least I am not being tortured by cortisol induced pain & panic type thinking - so that’s a huge win, a huge asset to better sleep or at least a meditative calm alternative.

I have come to rely on the Complex Tasks isochronic tones sets, wait for it……...to cope with doing the dishes & making lunch 🤣……yes……tasks that many take for granted have always brought anxiety creating disorganisation & stress for me…… it’s so embarrassing but once I begin something like this my brain shoots off in 10 other directions & it takes a massive amount of patience & self forgiveness to complete this basic task without starting to glue up my wellies or organise the recycling after I’ve put the eggs on….. 

Finally, an honourable mention to the ADD/ADHD Intense Relief tones where he essentially de-emotionsalises the brain by speeding up the rational left brain higher than the creative/emotional right side - I think it’s like brain gym, like practicing rationality from a purely mechanical, anatomical, functional direction. I think it’s wonderful & these ones can bring me out of a funk sometimes. Usually being in nature with Schumann Resonance is the way to go for low mood though.

I achieved some, for me extremely complex tasks to do with music technology reasonably sensibly with the help of one of the Peak Focus tone sets. Jason has even inspired me to go electric as a previously confirmed acoustic musician….. I now have a Synth, prepped an Isochronic tone backing track of my own & opened GarageBand for the first time in 15 yrs…. 😄 - wires, leads, I dealt with those at length without a panic attack. I call that a real win. 😅

Red Light Therapy plus Therapy

The current trend in Anti-Aging Red Light & Near Infared Therapy devices got me curious about its cell metabolism increasing capacity in the brain & sure enough the research throws up that trials for PTSD & TBI have shows some benefits. Also for Fibromyalgia for my daughter, which slows metabolism prematurely, a bit like aging too soon….. Anyhow, I’ve been working with a red light nir box for a few weeks now & I love it & I think combined with the insight building of psychotherapy/talk therapy of your choice, I feel the combination would be a real winner in natural treatment of severe mental illnesses.

The query I get is, in what way is this not just a remedy for not enough sunlight…… I’ve loved my light box during grey rainy UK May & it cheers me up & gets me going when it’s chilly but I fail to see how in a warmer climate this would be needed unless the person refuses or is otherwise unable to leave the house, then this could help mimic the sun on your head, stimulating increased cellular atp activity & increasing cell metabolism etc.

I get it for anti aging, in a way, as full spectrum sun is perceived as very aging but surely with sunblock & covering up etc you would still absorb lots of NIR as well as FIR light through your clothes producing the same healthy cellular stimulation. That’s my only query.

So anyway, I love my box & all the benefits I’ve felt from using it so far & yes my skin on my face looks fab imho, definitely enough change there to keep me interested but it’s the affect on my body that’s so fantastic- I feel more energetic, more toned, more enlivened & more positive since using the light box.

My one is not a huge box, it’s a 300w tilting unit by a company called Helios that I rotate body parts towards in the bathroom in the morning, especially sore muscles - I totally recommend this therapy device or a bigger one for people stuck in the house with mental illness or in the more light deprived countries. It’s extremely bright, brighter than the face mask types which cost twice the price for a third of the power per cm2 at a foot away. I wear eye protection or exercise great caution with it as it can cause a painful glare sensation.

A word of warning, I have to say this, just like sunshine, it significantly increases hormonal activity throughout your endocrine system indeed some users use it for this Testosterone boosting, sexual dysfunction restorative capacity - it also increases Melatonin too which is your sleep hormone & a master antioxidant & anti inflammatory agent. I love it but having struggled with Hypersexuality as many BPD & Bipolar people do as part of their illness I am enormously careful with it…… but it’s marvellous 😄🤭😉